Larry King says performing stand-up comedy is "orgasmic"; also "it's not brain surgery"

By | May 11, 2011 at 2:12 pm | 8 comments | News, Opinion, TV/Movies | Tags: , ,

Larry KingIn what will probably go down as one of the all-time creepiest statements about the art of stand-up comedy, former talk show host turned-comedian Larry King has described the act of performing comedy onstage as “orgasmic.”

When writer R. Scott Reedy asks King, “How does it feel to be embarking on a new career in stand-up comedy?” the 77-year-old King just had to immediately insert images of old-person ejaculations into the conversation. King says, “I learned a long time ago that this isn’t brain surgery, but I love it. When I go out on stage, it is orgasmic.”

Perhaps not as gross as the image of King cumming in his pants whilst slinging shitty jokes onstage for 90 minutes, but surely more offensive, is his flippant remark about stand-up “not being brain surgery.”

I had basically no respect for you as a stand-up comedian before you said this, Mr. King, but I was trying to give you the benefit of the doubt– seeing as you are (for reasons that, I guess, elude my generation) a celebrated television journalist.

Obviously, stand-up comedy isn’t brain surgery, but the implication in your statement, Larry, is that just about anyone could succeed onstage performing stand-up. Any real fan of comedy knows that this is horribly inaccurate. And no, I haven’t seen your current stage show, but I was there at the Comedy Central Roast for Donald Trump– without all the slick editing. You were horrendous.

If it weren’t for The Situation’s slightly more horrendous performance, you would’ve been outed as the unfunny, old guy who couldn’t stop laughing (and loudly inhaling through his nose every five seconds) that you are. You are just another example of celebrities sullying the good name of stand-up by throwing your fame around, trying to convince the world that you’re some sort of renaissance performer. You’re not. You’re just a bored, egomaniacal retired television personality.

You’ve given us enough unintentional laughs throughout the years. It’s time you stopped trying to make us laugh on purpose.

About the Author

Dylan P. Gadino

Dylan is the founder and editor in chief of Laughspin. He launched Punchline Magazine in 2005 (which became Laughspin in the summer of 2011) with childhood friend Bill Bergmann. Dylan lives in northern New Jersey with his wife and two sons. He hopes the Shire is real.

  • Sandy

    With the proper schooling, you can learn brain sugery….but if you are not funny, you cannot LEARN to be so sorry to say Brain Surgery is harder and Mr.King, I’m sure is proof of that theory on stage.

  • charles mann

    So Larry King thinks standup comedy is “orgasmic”. Clearly he’s speaking from memory. #CrazyOldCoot

  • Sharilyn

    As odd as this sounds, it’s something Larry’s been saying for many years when talking about his speaking engagements. He was on Conan back in maybe 1994, and called it “orgasmic” even then. In the same interview, he compared the anticipation of getting a laugh to “having to sneeze, and sneezing”.

    Somewhere, I have the audio of that portion of the interview on a cassette tape. (Dear 16 year old comedy nerd version of me: see, this shit DOES come in handy eventually!)

    But to your point:

    I agree with you that the whole premise of him suddenly being a standup now, and that it’s supposedly so easy, is offensive. But based on how he’s spoken about his speaking engagements in the past, I suspect he’s doing absolutely NOTHING different going forward.

    He’ll be telling the same old stories about his career that he was telling last year, and 5 years ago, and 20 years ago. If they’re funny stories, as I’ve understood they are, good for him. And if his people have figured out a new angle to get this old man some press for the same old schtick, good for them.

    Won’t get ME to buy a ticket, but I don’t think the reality is worth getting upset about.

  • Michael

    Thank you for writing this, Dylan.

  • Lawson

    Good shit Dylan. I agree completely.

  • Bobby Friske

    Booyah Dylan!
    Thanks for calling this dude out. Celebrities trying their hand at stand up, ugh. It’s annoying no doubt, but once you see them try to do an hour, or even feature it’s painfully obvious that their ego has made them delusional. However it’s at the cost of admission and a 2 drink minimum for some poor sap who went to the show.

    This means you King.

  • Dr. David Robinson

    He *is* right, though, in the respect that everyone *thinks* they can do stand-up, while in reality they can’t; as opposed to brain surgery, which most people think they *can’t* do, but is surprisingly easy. It’s getting licensed to do brain surgery that’s the hard part. . . not that I’ve let that stop me.

  • http://@jimimack7 Jimi Mack

    Larry King + brain surgery = microsurgery.

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