In what will probably go down as one of the all-time creepiest statements about the art of stand-up comedy, former talk show host turned-comedian Larry King has described the act of performing comedy onstage as “orgasmic.”
When writer R. Scott Reedy asks King, “How does it feel to be embarking on a new career in stand-up comedy?” the 77-year-old King just had to immediately insert images of old-person ejaculations into the conversation. King says, “I learned a long time ago that this isn’t brain surgery, but I love it. When I go out on stage, it is orgasmic.”
Perhaps not as gross as the image of King cumming in his pants whilst slinging shitty jokes onstage for 90 minutes, but surely more offensive, is his flippant remark about stand-up “not being brain surgery.”
I had basically no respect for you as a stand-up comedian before you said this, Mr. King, but I was trying to give you the benefit of the doubt– seeing as you are (for reasons that, I guess, elude my generation) a celebrated television journalist.
Obviously, stand-up comedy isn’t brain surgery, but the implication in your statement, Larry, is that just about anyone could succeed onstage performing stand-up. Any real fan of comedy knows that this is horribly inaccurate. And no, I haven’t seen your current stage show, but I was there at the Comedy Central Roast for Donald Trump– without all the slick editing. You were horrendous.
If it weren’t for The Situation’s slightly more horrendous performance, you would’ve been outed as the unfunny, old guy who couldn’t stop laughing (and loudly inhaling through his nose every five seconds) that you are. You are just another example of celebrities sullying the good name of stand-up by throwing your fame around, trying to convince the world that you’re some sort of renaissance performer. You’re not. You’re just a bored, egomaniacal retired television personality.
You’ve given us enough unintentional laughs throughout the years. It’s time you stopped trying to make us laugh on purpose.