The day is finally here, you guys! The seed Community planted during parallel-universe exploration has bloomed: Annie’s moving in with Troy and Abed! Huzzah! I’m relieved because I worried about Annie living in that terrible neighborhood, though if anyone could take Spaghetti, it’s our girl A. She’d probably just guilt him out of peeing on (moving) cars. Anyway, #AnniesMove! Yay!
One notable absentee? Jeff, who’s sick. Though, y’know, not actually sick but shopping for unflattering pool-chalk-blue shirts. As the rest of the gang endures the awful task of moving their friend (this his how you know they love one another), Annie realizes that her new roommates are kind of annoying, what with their tweeting everything and taping each other to doors. She’s 20; she’s never had roommates before. Let me tell you something, Annie. When you’re 35 and wine is your roommate, guys like this will look pretty great. How about you get off your high horse and go make some shadow puppets, mmmkay? What? I didn’t say anything.
Side note: Annie being loosey-goosey looks like Elaine Benis dancing.
Uh-oh, guess who also shops at the super-fake-looking store that sells unflattering blue shirts? The dean! His name is Craig! And guess also what! He knows that Jeff is skipping out on Annie’s move—he reads Trabed’s Twitter—and uses that info to blackmail Jeff into doing lunch with him. You’ve been deaned, Winger.
Meanwhile, in the ride from Annie’s old place in Rapeytown to her new pad, Britta schools Shirley for being so Jesusy and judgmental. Her lesson? You don’t get to be the arbiter of all things moral just because you’re Christian. And you don’t get to be a hypocrite. Teaching moment? It’s the Christian thing to do to pick up a hitchhiker, right? Even a stinky one. So that’s what they’re gonna do. Advantage Britta. Oh, unless said stinky hitchhiker’s a Jesus freak. Advantage Shirley. Or tie. Whatever.
Back in Rapeytown, Pierce is trying to help Annie hold on to her security deposit but is actually trashing the place. Over at the new pad, Annie’s seeing her new room, nay, blanket fort, for the first time, as well as the Secret Closet of Mystery. What’s in there, you ask? Could be a linen closet. If anyone knew what a linen closet was. Which they don’t.
Mariachi!!! Pierce the Ruiner ruins (and makes snow paint angels). Shirley’s religious hitchhiker friend is bats. And maybe Jesus. And definitely bats. Yep.
Jeff and Craig, now in matching blouses, are having what is no joke better than a lot of dates I’ve been on. Karaoke! Hey, the dean can really sing. Know what else he can do? Read student e-mails. That’s how he knew where Jeff would be buying unflattering blue tops. (Am I being too harsh? He’s just so beautiful, and that button-down does him no favors.) Guess which student he likes to spy on most. (Can you blame him?) Blackmail over. The dean is going down. (That’s what she said (What?).
Hey, look, Dreamatorium. Annie’s sick of suppressing her uptightedness just to fit in. She’s uptight—deal with it. And she wants her own bedroom. Troy and Abed must make a choice: Drematorium or Annie. They choose…both! Yay.
Hey, weren’t Britta and Troy supposed to be liking each other or something? I’m glad they’re not: I’m a fan of the original Greendale two, Breff. I had hopes there might be some spontaneous make-out on the bottom bunk, but Jeff was busy bawling like a baby. So…no.
Dean in the moon!!!
And that’s all she wrote. Last night was fun! I admittedly got distracted toward the end of my second viewing by a) my roommate [wine] and b) the pair of boots I online-shopped while typing which totally won’t fit over my calves but I really, really hope will. No Chang, no Goodman (sorry, Dan Conner), just good old-fashioned Jeff being Jeff and Annie being Annie and Britta actually being pretty cool but still Britta (see also: Amsterdam story) and so on and so forth. Until next week, Greendalians.
So what did you guys think? Good stuff, right???